


Stark

by BD99



Series: Gangsters In Love Aurora James [1]
Category: Gangsters in Love (Visual Novel)
Genre: Canon Lesbian Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, F/F, Family Feels, Family Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 12:04:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15096338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BD99/pseuds/BD99
Summary: Lucy James may have the girl, the house, the kids, and the money but one thing she does not have is closure.   She visits her mother, Susan Kim, in prison in an effort to figure out just what she wants now that all the secrets are out in the open.





	Stark

_“-The walls are too stark-“_  
  
That was the first thing Lucy noticed from her cramped chair as she filled out the guest registration. The scratching sound of her pen was soothing. A tick here, a scratch there. Dot the i and cross the t. Two years ago, it would have been effortless. Two years ago, she wouldn’t even have been here. She wouldn’t have needed to visit a prison. Wouldn’t need to answer invasive questions.  
  
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ARRESTED?  
  
That question formed a pit in Lucy’s stomach, enough for her to let the pen come to a stop. Pristine white teeth dug into her light pink lip, teasing the gloss off as she attempted to think how to answer that.  
  
Two years ago, it would have been easy. Lucy Kim had been a stand-up citizen. Not even a parking fine to her name. She’d gone to school and graduated. She had a nice enough house in a quiet neighbourhood. A nice dog. Loving parents. She’d spent every weekend watching her favourite drama series and drooling over the lead actor and actress with equal desire. A desire only outclassed by her love for ice-cream and a comfortable robe.  
  
A lot had changed in two years, however.  
  
Lucy Kim had started so pure and sweet, until she had been forced to her knees. Until she had listened to men discuss whether to rape her first or just kill her. As she’d stared down the barrel of a gun her life had been chaotically ripped from underneath her.  
  
Lucy Kim had learned to fight. Learned to shoot. She even had even killed. Lucy Kim HAD been arrested. Arrested, but not convicted. She’d spent a terrifying night in a cell, alone and framed by her family as she panicked for the woman she loved.  
  
Steeling herself, Lucy continued to write down details. Questions of employment, some light medical. Mainly, questions about her legal status. Prison times, licences, if she had any history substance abuse. Again, her pen flowed, the scratch and pauses fluidly mixing with the turning of pages. Around her, others did the same, signing forms or talking in hushed tones on the phone. The soft background noise was enough to break Lucy out of her thoughts, until she came to a particular question.  
  
ARE YOU MARRIED?  
  
Where before there had been led in her belly, now it was molten fire. The giddiness flushed through her body like a tidal wave, causing her to bounce her feet off the cold ground in excitement. Of course, the sound of her shoes flapping was a change, but Lucy hardly noticed. Her mind was consumed with thoughts of chocolate hair and blazing eyes, the burn of vodka on her lover’s tongue. The saltiness of peanut butter around the rim of a shot glass, mixed with dark chocolate and a sweet yet strong alcohol. Of a black spade glistening over a toned belly, a naval ring just begging her to flick it.  
  
YES.  
  
The answer was the easiest and yet the most difficult one to answer. It was, after all, the reason she was here. Yet thoughts of her wife were so deliciously distracting. Even apart, Lucy could almost smell expensive lotion. Could almost feel Aurora’s hands all over her, which was not appropriate for a public setting. She forced herself to take a deep breath, wincing at the scent of cleaning products, air freshener and sweat. As her gaze lowered, she noted the light gleaming around her finger, catching in the diamonds of her wedding ring. A ring that had come after the impromptu wedding, and after the wedding night.  
  
_“-is it hot in here?-“_ she wondered, pausing to fan herself with her papers.  
  
HOW MANY CHILDREN  
  
That question was a dose of cold water to her libido, yet a spring breeze of hope and joy to her heart. Lucy’s lips peeled back into a huge smile as she thought of her daughter.    The paperwork was signed, the legal work done. Stella was now HER DAUGHTER. The little dark-skinned girl with twinkling eyes that were steel coloured, akin to hers, but twinkled with mischief exactly like Aurora’s. Those eyes had been the breaking point for both women with Stella. The little street girl who had reminded Lucy so much of Aurora she couldn’t bear to let her go. Lucy James in her mid-twenties had everything she’d dreamed of as a girl of Stella’s age. Well, except she had an inscrutable princess instead of a lug headed yet handsome prince.  
  
With paperwork completed, Lucy came to where her signature was required. Thoughtlessly, she allowed the pen to flow, pausing once she was through. It was a punch to her gut all over again.  
  
For all her life, she’d proudly signed Lucy Kim. Even after her parents vanished and after the crisis with the gangs, she’d never bothered to sign her name any other way. Now, now that name was ash in her mouth. It was a bitter reminder of all the lies, deceit and horrors she had been forced to face. It was not even her legal name.  
  
Angrily, she raked the pen across the signature, erasing the last name with all her fury. A slash for every ounce of pain she had suffered.  
A slash for the men who had discussed her rape or murder.  
Four. Five. Six.  
A slash for every man who had attacked her personally.  
Fourteen, fifteen.  
A slash for every time she had been attacked for the name Kim.  
Twenty-nine. Thirty.  
For her own parent’s gang who had drawn guns on her.  
Forty-Eight. Forty-nine.  
  
There, she had to pause, panting for a moment before she drew the pen downwards on an angle, crossing it through the mess from one direction.  
  
Fifty. For her father.  
  
She repeated the pattern on the other side.  
  
Fifty-one. For her mother.  
  
  
RIP.  
  
The pen finally tore through the paper, as if a knife had been dragged through flesh. A knife Aurora would take for her. The bullets they had faced. Every bruise and cut. It all came rushing back as Lucy did her best to stand. Her legs shook, knees rattling together bellow the line of her dark skirt as she took one shaky step, then another, and another. Each step was a new line in her mind. She was NOT going to back down! Not now.  
  
The words and orders passed in a blur as an armed man came to her side, guiding her through a door that needed a code and card to be unlocked. Lucy ignored the looks everyone gave her, the doubt written across the desk clerks face as she saw the state of the paper. It was CLEAR Lucy had issues, but she was not under arrest. She was calmly escorted into a private room, left sitting at a steel table patiently as the guards moved just outside the door. Lucy was not there as a prisoner, merely to see someone who was.  
  
“Lucy?” The soft, hopeful voice tore Lucy from her mental blank. It dragged her, kicking and screaming over melted glass and burning coals, back to the sombre reality as she stared into the hopeful hazel eyes of Susan Kim.  
  
“Mom...” was all Lucy could say in greeting, clenching her fists so tightly that she could feel her own nails bite into her palms. It was sharper than grazing. The amount of times Lucy had been forced to dive for cover, to crawl for her life, she was very familiar with the feeling of raw palms. The realisation brought more rage, but also deep sadness.  
  
“You look good.” Susan offered, almost as if speaking to a stranger.  
  
_“-in a way, she is. She doesn’t know me anymore-“_ Lucy’s realisation was as bitter as the fact she couldn’t stop loving the woman sitting across from her.  
  
The years and stress had taken their toll on Susan, turning the hair at her temples grey and adding deeper wrinkles to her forehead. Her cheeks looked that little bit gaunt, whereas they had always been like Lucy’s. Full yet not chubby, the perfect mix of high and petite that gave a doll like appearance. Almond eyes were droopier now, wrinkled in the corners. No longer were they wide and bright like her daughter’s. Her lips were also different. Cracked, with chunks taken out of the skin as if she had bitten down too hard. The shadows beneath her lips were more pronounced, as if a frown had dominated her face so utterly that its shadow even invaded her tense smile.  
  
“You mean I don’t look hurt!” Lucy bit back, partially to have a dig and partially to avoid the honest truth. Susan looked like utter, miserable shit.  
  
“You know I worry about you, love...” those were the wrong words for Susan to say, but Lucy held her tongue as the older lady continued.  
  
“Especially after that Hustler Whore dragged you into the Valentines.”  
  
Now THOSE were **_definitely_** the wrong words to say.  
  
“YOU AND DAD FORCED ME THERE!” Lucy’s scream exploded so violently from her lithe frame that the guard outside seemed ready to jump in. The blonde’s shoulders shook with effort as she placed her hands on the table, keeping them flat as she stared straight into her mother’s eyes.  
  
“And don’t you DARE call my wife a whore or you’ll never see me again!”  
  
“Lucy. You know she has a reputation,” Susan tried to reason.  
  
“Of course I do. I’ve seen the texts Rory sent to all the girls. I’ve seen the scandalous photos and met so many exes who want another night with AJ that I can’t count them. I don’t care to. Aurora NEVER lied to me about any of that. About her profession, who she was or who she fucked and why... unlike you.” the cuss tasted foul on Lucy’s tongue, uttered with such jealousy despite her best efforts that even Susan looked concerned.  
  
“If she was like that with so many women, lying to them all, what makes you special?”  
  
“For one, she never lied to them. She told them all time and time again that it was a fling, or just a hook up. She was never like that with me, Mom. From the beginning she asked me to call her Rory. Not AJ. Yeah, of course she flirted, aggressively, but she never took it too far. From the first night, I slept beside her. I slept in underwear for months, and never was there another woman. Or even me. She didn’t even try to touch me. She was all bark.” the words poured out of Lucy, drawn out by the alarmed expression in Susan’s eyes.  
  
“There was a pattern. As she said it. Woo them, use them, screw them then lose them. What mother wouldn’t be concerned hearing about that? Even if they didn’t know about her... activities”  
  
“You robbed her, then fled. You left ME with your name, debts and every gang in the city wanting me dead! The night the Valentines took me, they saved my life. I was held at gunpoint. By masked men. They were going to kill me regardless, whether they fucked me first or not,” Lucy sighed, her energy evaporating as she collapsed once more into the chair. The tension of those events bubbled over, causing the story to come tumbling out. It had to, Lucy couldn’t stay calm and sane if it didn’t.  
  
“I was on my knees, hit, gun in my face. I was alone and terrified... then two men in suits barged in. One was as cold as ice, the other was waving a sword. He brought a sword to a gunfight and won,” Lucy shook her head, unable to erase the memory of Yoshimitzu leaping through the door with a Katana. Of Chance, cool and collected as he strode in with his gun drawn.  
  
“They tried talking to me, somewhat, but had to throw me into the car during a firefight. My chicken of a dog trusted them at the start and jumped right in. Their hitman was cuddling my dog in the kidnapping car, pausing to shoot enemy gangsters.” Lucy shook her head again, remembering how quickly Seymour had settled in with the gangsters. How, despite their intimidating personas, they’d melted at the Dalmatian. How quickly they’d all begun to spoil him, almost like a favourite child.  
  
  
“Aside from going with them that first time, they always gave me a choice. If I stayed with them, they would protect me. Provide me complete freedom so long as I stayed with my guard. They even let me choose, mom!   Jailers who let me pick my warden, and Aurora was...” Lucy froze, her ears burning as a blush violently flared up in her cheeks. She COULDN’T disclose how she had felt.  She couldn’t admit to how damn attracted to the dangerous woman she had been, or how just a finger under her chin was enough to make her melt. Enough to freeze her in her chair as Aurora had sat in her lap and calmly fed her all the cold facts about her parents. How Aurora’s hands had instantly found the one spot on her neck that undid all her tension. Those chaste, gentle touches had destroyed all shame and reservations Lucy could ever have about Aurora over the next month. Without Aurora even truly meaning to seduce her. Heck, with Aurora trying desperately to keep her devious hands away from Lucy.  
  
“We didn’t think they’d force you to hustle for them!”  
  
“They didn’t! I...” Lucy coughed. She couldn’t admit she followed Aurora to the cabana. How they’d played with cards in the fresh breeze until Aurora became overjoyed at Lucy’s natural talent. She couldn’t explain how sinfully Aurora had touched her, simply massaging tension from her shoulders until she was practically begging the gangster to ruin her. How just that simple affection and soft voice had almost undone every sane thought in her head. Or how she’d blindly agreed to help the older woman to pay off her debt, only to be signed up as a poker player.  
  
“She seduced you?”  
  
“No! Not exactly... Aurora wouldn’t touch me. That was the prob-“Lucy practically steamed in embarrassment, even as her mother’s own cheeks flamed up. Two hardened criminals, both blushing like teenagers.  
  
“She played cards with me, realised I had a photographic memory, she already knew I could do quick calculations. She figured out I could count cards if I saw even single one. More than one deck too. She offered to wave the debt if I could win a tournament she couldn’t play in after Chance’s father...” Lucy trailed off, shivering despite herself. A lump formed in her throat, tight and uncomfortable. Scarcely allowing her to breathe, let alone speak.  
  
“Franco Valentine.” Susan growled softly, her jaw working as if she could chew through an invisible knot. At that, Lucy nodded. She didn’t need to explain much more about the altercation. Save for Aurora.  
  
“He was terrifying mom, made me feel small and worthless without even looking at me. Aurora put herself between him and me, constantly shielded me from him. She wasn’t going to let me get hurt, and I knew it. Even terrified, I instinctively went to her. When she was angry, she never EVER hurt me. I wanted to help her. Wanted to get my life back. Then...”  
  
“You fell in love with her.” Susan surmised with a contemplative parental scowl.  
  
“Yeah. Everything about her is just... I can’t resist. She made everything feel possible. Made me feel safe and secure. She even let me drive home. The moment she saw the damage at the house she was absolutely distressed, even furious for me. She was so concerned that it sobered her up after half a bottle of whiskey! I had nightmares every now and again. About the broken glass. Staring down the barrel of the gun. Rory started holding me at night just to comfort me... Her being there chased that fear away when I had no one I could turn to.”  
  
“I’m so, so sorry.” Susan sniffled, guilt radiating from her being.  
  
“We never truly thought it would touch you. We were invincible and smarter than the underworld. We felt... like how Rory makes you feel. Brad and I became addicted to the rush, the thrill and games. It was always just one more time, an itch we couldn’t stop scratching. Then we were too deep, and we didn’t want you to drown with us. We were so stupid!”  
  
“I can’t say I haven’t been stupid. Chance told the gang not to touch me. Aurora and I, we wanted each other badly. Aurora wouldn’t even kiss me unless I could spell her name. For her reputation, she’s a sweet gentlewoman.” Lucy informed, her lips twitching into an exhausted smile at the thought of the Mexican born woman waiting for her. Rory was respectful of boundaries, but within the set lines she certainly misbehaved.  
  
“You’re telling me she treated you like you were her dirty little secret?” Susan demanded, anger beginning to flare in her again. The rattle of her cuffs didn’t go unnoticed, yet all Lucy had the true energy to offer was a shake of her head. A silent rebuttal.  
  
“We knew the risks, but we’re grown women.  We decided it was our right to decide who could touch us, not Chance’s. As we got more serious, we got caught. Skylar filmed us in the car, after the first round of the tournament. She used it to tilt me. Almost cost me the tournament. The gang got to see video of us...” the blonde bit her lip for a moment, cheeks flushing as she remembered the horror. The silence that had followed as Irving had quickly shut the laptop. Chance’s determination to see everything, even as Aurora had all but begged him not to.  
  
“The angle shown made things look more randy scandal and less teenage smooching. It broke a lot of trust. Plus, we’ve both gotten reckless chasing our families. Aurora even beat her brother up in the private casino rooms.” Lucy admitted, no longer bothering with her doubts and anger. She had once been so close with her mother, even her rage and the betrayals couldn’t destroy her instinct to dump everything. The long-formed habit of spilling all her secrets.  
  
“I don’t need to hear explicit details, but... does she treat you right? Even if I can’t look past, well, the criminal lifestyle. I would be a hypocrite to judge her for it entirely.”  
  
“We’re trying to get out, mom. We have Stella to worry about. And, OH, does she treat me right. She’s everything the rumours say she is as a partner, and more. She’s so giving,” Lucy swooned, her lips curling up hopelessly. The rumours of how AJ spoiled her women were true, but there were no rumours for her thoughtfulness. About how perfectly her fingers could seek out tension in Lucy’s body and erase it. Of how she delighted to rub her wife’s back until no knots remained after a shootout, just to know Lucy was safe. No rumours about how beautiful she was when she was half awake and smiling with her bed hair, or the way her hips swayed when she brushed her teeth.  
  
“I don’t need to imagine AJ in bed with my daughter, Lucy. The rumours are explicit enough without...” Susan gaped, lifting one of her cuffed hands to cover her face. Mainly to avoid the far away glaze of her daughter’s eyes. Lucy couldn’t help but laugh, the trickle of closeness growing more comfortable as she talked. The bleach blonde quickly realised what she said may have appeared less innocent than it was. Quickly, she went to correct her mistake, cheeks once more aflame.  
  
“Not just in bed. In everything. She gives me everything she is. She never does anything I don’t say yes to. Even if she wrecks me, she cherishes me too. She never just lets me win, she respects me. She’s always supporting me. She’s sweet and loving, even when she’s dangerous and possessive. She gives me the world, mom, and she is so amazing with Stella. She understands our pain and how to help us. She’s even giving up drinking. She started a little before we began dating but really put her soul into quitting the moment we were official. She’s learned she can talk to me, instead of unhealthy habits. I’m really proud of her.” Lucy gushed, her smile growing infectious despite it all. The anger was there, simmering in her breast at all the damage between them as a family. Yet, her mother appeared to be finally listening. Trying to understand.  
  
“I’ve seen how scary she can be. I’ve seen her kill. I know she’s not perfect.   It isn’t enough to make me leave. She‘s thrown herself in front of guns for me, risked her life because I was hurt or scared. She’s sacrificed so many of her lifelong rules and overcome so many issues just to be with me. She treats me right. I’m in love with her and I love her. I love Stella. I love you too, mom, but I need to build this up. You hurt me, you nearly shot the love of my life. You used the girl who is now my daughter as a weapon against Rory and I... I don’t even know if I want to...”  
  
“I understand. You’re my daughter. Your father and I were so convinced that Aurora was using you that we couldn’t listen, and we sacrificed any rights to our relationship with you with how we acted. You love us, but can’t forgive us.” Susan stated, hanging her head as tears dripped from her eyes.  
  
“You and dad nearly got me killed. Ruined my life. How can I just get over that, even though I love you?” Lucy asked, suddenly like a child begging for the answer. Her own eyeliner trickled down her cheeks as her own tears started to fall, burning hot in her eyes. How could she? How could she reconcile the burning hatred in the pit of her stomach along with the pain in her chest?  
  
“Please” Susan’s voice wavered, catching in her throat. It was raw desperation. Thick with horror.  
  
“I don’t know if I ever can...” Lucy sniffled, her voice remarkably level despite the sorrow dripping down her cheeks, and the slurp of snot in her nose as she took a deep breath. A piercing beep broke the air, signalling that their time in the room had come to an end. Lucy pushed herself to her feet, bracing her hands against the table again. The backs of her thighs were sticky, leaving sweaty imprints on the uncomfortable chair. Her backside tingled, recovering the sense of feeling after such a time spent under pressure.  
  
“I want to get to know Aurora, and Stella. Even with our history, it’s clear you love them both dearly. Every mother needs time to get to know their in-laws”  
  
“You lost the right to be called a mother when you chose scams over your daughter” Lucy informed, clenching her teeth as she sniffled once more. She roughly dragged the sleeve of her blazer across her nose, wiping away the sickly trails of mucus. It didn’t matter if she ruined her clothing, money could fix the damage. Her pride, however? Her relationship with her parents? No.  
  
“Please... Lucy... don’t leave it like this” Susan wailed, desperation breaking through as she stood up. The moment her backside left her chair, the guard rushed in, grasping the wailing woman by her elbow. The prison suit hung on the lithe woman’s frame, finally showing how old she truly was. No longer was Susan’s body well fed, rather ghoulish off prison fashions. Off her own guilt.  
  
_“-she really does look half dead-“_ Lucy noted, even as she spoke softly to the departing figures.  
  
“Goodbye, mom. I love you”  
  
“LUCY!”  


**Author's Note:**

> So, I felt this was left hanging after a whole season. The offer was that Irving could get them out or MC could visit and yet it was never fully addressed what MC had decided. So, I felt inspired to write a little piece and make some head cannons about the family as a whole.  
> (Sidenote. I used the Kim surname BEFORE Andi's route came out, I am in no way implying ANY relations whatsoever... though it would be pretty sweet.)


End file.
